I bless the LORD who gives me counsel; in the night also my heart instructs me. I have set the LORD always before me, because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Psalm 16:7-8 ESV

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 ESV

The middle of the night has been an unexpected friend as of late. Lying awake in the thick of the darkness has presented itself as a time to pray and to make my petitions known to God for loved ones and to cast my cares upon the Lord. These past few years have had their share of both testing and blessing, and the tests have not only been at my doorstep, but they have taught me more about drawing close to God and trusting His ways than anything else ever could.

It is not lost on me how distant and comfortable we can become in our fellowship with Christ when all is well. We all so desperately want to have smooth sailing and calm seas without ever so much a crest of a wave to rock the boat, but we are not promised such things lest we do away with the sea itself. The suffering and dark times which overwhelm us can attempt to drown us, blurring our vision and suffocating our hope, causing us to look inward rather than to look upward and unto God Himself for refuge.

I get it. The waves are real. The uncertainty and the burdens can be overwhelming and seem as if too much to bear, but the assurance of His Word and of God Himself calms those anxious ebbs and flows, and the tears which flow with every cry unto God stream past the sea and into the very hands of the Lord who holds those tears. What comfort it brings to be reminded of Psalm 56:8, “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Suffering is not lost on God nor is it wasted. The psalmists remind us that pain and sorrow are vital notes in the song of a life sung unto the Lord.

Petitions in prayer are not the only thing whispered and carried by the darkness these days, those seemingly unintelligible words which no other man comprehends but God never misses. Piercing the darkness in these intimate moments are sacrifices of praise, giving thanks to God for His mercy, His grace and His steadfast love. The sorrow turns to joy as I exalt God on a pillow without rest, quietly telling of His majestic splendor and of His holiness. He is good. He is worthy, righteous, and mighty. He is forever faithful, and no matter what changes life brings, His attributes do not change. I praise Him in the brokenness, thankful that as His child by grace through faith in Christ, He does not despise my brokenness.

Philippians 4:6,7 interweaves itself into those times as I remind myself to be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving to make my requests known to God, and after having done that, the peace of God which surpasses understanding will guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus. I have repeated this verse countless times in prayer, through tears and anguish and through joy and contentment.

I notice how Paul told the Philippians to pray and to supplicate. Many dislike that word supplicate because it is a pleading, an urgent begging. It is a dependency on the One whom we place our hope and trust, relinquishing control that we never had in the first place. It is not there by accident, but then we are told in the midst of prayer and supplications to have thanksgiving on our lips. We thank Him not because of the desired outcome, but because He is God, and His peace sustains us. Thanksgiving unto God is a beacon in the dark of night because this praise is not dependent on me or my feelings. It is a proclamation and a focus on Who is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and commendable (Philippians 4:8).

What happens when we do not get what we so desire and have asked for in prayer? Is God no longer worthy of praise and thanksgiving? Is He no longer God? Will we thank Him when the answer to prayer is no or not yet? Paul did not assure the Philippians they would receive their prayers and petitions as asked. He told them that the peace of God would guard their hearts and minds in Christ Jesus in the midst of their prayers and supplications with thanksgiving. There is a peace which He gives that though we suffer and have moments of weakness, the world can neither diminish nor obliterate. He strengthens us in our weakness, and when those dark moments come, we pray. We supplicate, and we do not fail to thank God in all circumstances. There is always a reason to praise Him, and it is ever more clear in the darkness.